Wife jokes

Husband: "Want a quickie?"

Wife: "As opposed to what?"

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?

The dog of course ... at least he'll shut up after you let him in!

A man inserted an advertisement in the classifieds "Wife Wanted".

The next day, he received hundreds of replies, all reading the same thing: "You can have mine."

If your wife and your lawyer were drowning and you had to choose, would you go to lunch or to the cinema?

What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man?

His wife is good at picking out clothes.