Husband jokes

60 jokes about husbands



Husband: "Want a quickie?"

Wife: "As opposed to what?"

58     → Joke

My husband said he wanted more space.

So I locked him outside.

50     → Joke

Why are husbands like lawn mowers?

They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half the time.

31     → Joke

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?

1) After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
2) A dog only takes a couple of months to train.

37     → Joke

I think the only reason my husband likes to go fishing so much is that it's the only time he hears someone tell him, "Wow, that's a big one!"

47     → Joke

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