Husband jokes

59 jokes about husbands



Husband: "Want a quickie?"

Wife: "As opposed to what?"

65     → Joke

My husband said he wanted more space.

So I locked him outside.

53     → Joke

Why are husbands like lawn mowers?

They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half the time.

33     → Joke

Why didn't the husband change the baby for a week?

Because the text on the diapers package said '18-40 lbs'.

31     → Joke

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?

1) After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
2) A dog only takes a couple of months to train.

36     → Joke

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