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    Women · Men · Peace · War
    woman,kick bagA woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a Genie's lamp. She picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a Genie appeared. The amazed woman asked if she was going to receive the usual three wishes.

    The Genie said, "Nope ... due to inflation, constant downsizing, low wages in third-world countries, and fierce global competition, I can only grant you one wish. So ... what'll it be?"

    The woman didn't hesitate. She said, "I want peace in the Middle East. See this map? I want these countries to stop fighting with each other."

    The Genie looked at the map and exclaimed, "Gadzooks, lady! These countries have been at war for thousands of years. I'm good, but not THAT good! I don't think it can be done. Make another wish."

    The woman thought for a minute and said, "Well, I've never been able to find the right man. You know, one that's considerate and fun, likes to cook and helps with the housecleaning, is good in bed and gets along with my family, doesn't watch sports all the time, and is faithful. That's what I wish for ... a good mate."

    The Genie let out a long sigh and said, "Let me see that fucking map!"
    6 Comments · Details
    Men · Wives · Bars
    man,proposing marriageTwo guys and a girl were sitting at a bar talking about their lives.

    The first guy said, "I'm a YUPPIE. You know, Young Urban Professional."

    The second guy responded, "I'm a DINK. You know, Double Income No Kids."

    They then asked the woman, "What are you?"

    She replied: "I'm a WIFE. You know, Wash, Iron, Fuck, Etc."
    4 Comments · Details


    Men · Navy · Sex · Parrots · Animals
    man,weedA young man with a wild and multi-coloured hairstyle sits next to an old man on a park bench. The old man stares at the young man.

    "What's the matter, old man?" says the young man. "Never done anything crazy in your life?"

    The old man replies: "Yeah. When I was in the Navy, I got really drunk one night and had sex with a parrot. I thought you might be my son."
    10 Comments · Details


    Women · Men · Beer · Alcohol · Earth
    woman,callingHOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN

    Compliment her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, wine and dine her, buy gifts for her, listen to her, respect her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her.

    HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN

    Arrive naked ... with beer.
    17 Comments · Details
    Men · Wives · Marriage
    man,paint canA man had his credit card stolen. He however decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.
    9 Comments · Details

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