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Death
skull,crossbonesDo you know what the death rate around here is?

One per person.
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Chuck Norris · Death
skull,crossbonesIf you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
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Hunters · Death · Emergencies · Shooting
skull,swordsA couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
8 Comments · Details


Men · Wives · Death · Dishes
caveman,foodHow can you tell if your wife is dead?

The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
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Husbands · Wives · Mourning · Death
woman,rosesA man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?"

The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?"

The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, "My wife's first husband."
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