A lady in labour is shouting the usual stuff: "Get this out of me!", "Give me the drugs!",... She turns to her boyfriend and says: "You did this to me you bastard!"34 Sex Jokes
He replies casually: "If you remember, I wanted to stick it up your arse but you said 'Fuck Off! It'll be too painful!' Not laughing now are we!?"
Two Greeks chat.34 Sex Jokes
Costa: "Did you ever fuck your girlfriend in the other hole?"
Spiros: "You are fuckin mad. I don’t want to make her pregnant!"
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.33 Death Jokes
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
Why was the blondes' belly button sore?32 Blonde Jokes
Because her boyfriend was blonde too.
Dianne goes to the doctor, and says, "Doctor, I've got a bit of a problem. I'll have to take my clothes off to show you."32 Sex JokesNext page JokesFriend Sayings
The doctor tells her to go behind the screen and disrobe. She does so, and the doctor goes round to see her when she is ready.
"Well, what is it?" he asks.
"It's a bit embarrassing," she replies. "These two green circles have appeared on the inside of my thighs."
The doctor examines her and finally admits he has no idea what the cause is. Then he suddenly asks, "Is your boyfriend a Harley rider?"
The woman blushes and says, "Well, actually he is."
"That's the problem," the doctor says. "Tell him his earrings aren't real gold."