If you can't change your mind, are you sure you still have one?
Why is a man like the weather?
Nothing can be done to change either one of them.
How many Borg does it take to change a light bulb?
1) Changing light bulbs is futile. Resistance is voltage divided by current.
2) None. They just self-destruct the malfunctioning equipment.
3) All of them.
How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
1) Three. One to prosecute, one to defend, one to screw it the same way they do everything else.
2) How many can you afford?
Officer: "Soldier, do you have change for a dollar?"
Soldier: "Sure, buddy."
Officer: "That's no way to address an officer! Now let's try it again!"
Officer: "Soldier. Do you have change for a dollar?"
Soldier: "No, SIR!"