Jokes - Smoking
Smoking Jokes
Smoking 3 Quotes | An Alcoholic, a Chain Smoker and a Homosexual go to the doctor. The doctor says: "If any of you indulge one more time you'll die." As they walk home they pass a bar. The Alcoholic has a shot of whiskey, falls off his stool stone cold dead. His friends are shocked. As they walk along they come upon a cigarette butt lying on the ground still burning. The Homosexual looks at the Chain Smoker and says: "If you bend over to pick that up, we're both dead!" 3 Comments · Single View
 Four worms were placed into four separate jars.The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol. The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a jar of sperm. The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil. After one day: The first worm - dead. Second worm - dead. Third worm - dead. Fourth worm - alive. Lesson: As long as you drink, smoke and have sex, you won't get worms! 1 Comment · Single View  Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette and continued smoking.Lady 1: "What's that?" Lady 2: "A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet." Lady 1: "Where did you get it?" Lady 2: "You can get them at any drugstore." The next day ... Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers. Lady 1: "It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel." 18 Comments · Single View  The bus driver announces that smoking is prohibited and punishable by a fine of several hundred dollars.Suddenly, a baby starts crying. "Come on kid," the bus driver said "you're only 6 months old, you can make it without a cigarette." 9 Comments · Single View |