Smoking - 9 jokes
46
girlfriend jokesThe
bus driver announces that smoking is prohibited and punishable by a fine of several hundred dollars.
Suddenly, a
baby starts
crying.
"Come on kid," the bus driver said "you're only 6 months old, you can make it without a
cigarette."
22
baby jokesAn
Alcoholic, a Chain Smoker and a
Homosexual go to the doctor.
The doctor says: "If any of you indulge one more time you'll die."
As they walk home they pass a bar. The Alcoholic has a shot of whiskey, falls off his stool stone cold dead. His friends are shocked.
As they walk along they come upon a cigarette butt lying on the ground still burning. The Homosexual looks at the Chain Smoker and says: "If you bend over to pick that up, we're both dead!"
31
alcoholic jokesFour
worms were placed into four separate
jars.
The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol.
The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.
The third worm was put into a jar of sperm.
The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.
After one day: The first worm - dead. Second worm - dead. Third worm - dead. Fourth worm - alive.
Lesson: As long as you drink, smoke and have
sex, you won't get worms!
18
worm jokesA
man walks into a
pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of
tampons for his
wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, "You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of
cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's so much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own ... so does she.
28
tampon jokesNext page
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