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Day jokes

278 jokes about days


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When was the longest day in the Bible?

The day Adam was created because there was no Eve.

18    


This morning as I was buttoning my shirt, a button fell off. After that, I picked up my briefcase, and the handle fell off. Then I went to open the door, and the doorknob fell off. I went to get into my car, and the door handle came off in my hand. Now I'm afraid to pee.

76    


The day Microsoft makes something that doesn't suck is probably the day they start making vacuum cleaners.

21    

computer

woman,roses
After spending all day watching football, Harry fell asleep in front of the TV and spent the whole night in the chair. In the morning, his wife woke him up.

"Get up dear," she said, "it's 20 to seven."

He awoke with a start and said, "In who's favor?"

10    


Four worms were placed into four separate jars.

The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol.

The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.

The third worm was put into a jar of sperm.

The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.

After one day: The first worm - dead. Second worm - dead. Third worm - dead. Fourth worm - alive.

Lesson: As long as you drink, smoke and have sex, you won't get worms!

11    


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