Three men were standing side-by-side using the urinal
The first man finished, zipped up and started washing and literally scrubbing his hands
... clear up to his elbows ... He used about 20 paper towels before he finished. He turned to the other two men and commented: "I graduated from Harvard and they taught us to be clean."
The second man finished, zipped up and quickly wet the tips of his fingers, grabbed one paper towel and commented: "I graduated from the University of California and they taught us to be environmentally conscious."
The third man zipped up and as he was walking out the door he had a smirk on his face and said: "I don't know about you guys, but where I went to college
, they taught us not to piss on our hands."
"Well," snarled the tough old Navy Chief
to the bewildered Seaman. "I suppose after you get discharged from the Navy, you'll just be waiting for me to die so you can come and piss on my grave
"Not me, Chief!" the Seaman replied. "Once I get out of the Navy, I'm never going to stand in line