26 jokes about planes
24 cemetery jokes
’s worst air disaster
occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery
search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies
so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into
11 blonde jokes
is on a four-engine plane crossing the Atlantic.
All of a sudden there's a loud bang. The pilot
announces over the intercom “I'm sorry, one of our engines
has just shut off. We'll be delayed 45 minutes.”
Suddenly there's another bang. Once again, the intercom clicks on and the pilot expresses his regret that they'll be delayed two hours.
Shortly thereafter, there is third bang and the pilot announces that they'll be delayed 3 hours.
The blonde turns to the guy sitting beside her and says, “Man, if the fourth engine shuts off we'll be up here all day.”
24 mother jokes
and her son
were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby
dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"
The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the stewardess
. So the boy asked the stewardess, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"
The stewardess responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?" The boy admitted that this was the case. "Well, then, tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Southwest always pulls out on time. Your mother can explain that to you."
Cessna10 pilot jokes
: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot
, I am out of fuel
Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight?!?!!"
Cessna: "Uh ... tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is."
18 parrot jokesNext page Jokes
On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot
strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess
for a coffee where upon the parrot squawks "And get me a whisky
you cow!" The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot and forgets the coffee.
When this omission is pointed out to her the parrot drains its glass and bawls "And get me another whisky you idiot". Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee.
Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot's approach "I've asked you twice for a coffee, go and get it now or I'll kick you".
The next moment, both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says "For someone who can't fly, you complain too much!"