A couple on honeymoon in hotel room undressing. The groom removes his socks and the bride asks: "What's wrong with your feet, your toes look all mangled?"38 Sex Jokes
Groom: "I had Tolio as a child."
Bride: "You mean Polio?"
Groom: "No Tolio, the disease only affected my toes."
The groom then removes his pants and the bride asks: "What is wrong with your knees, they are lumpy and deformed?"
Groom: "As a child I had Kneasles."
Bride: "You mean Measles?"
Groom: "No Kneasles, a strange illness that only affected my knees."
The Bride then removes his boxers and the bride asks: "Why are you spotted?"
Groom: "As a child I had smallpox."
Bride: "I hope you don't mean SmallCox!"
Johnny asks his grandpa, "do you still have sex with granny?"47 Sex Jokes
Grandpa says, "Yes, but only oral."
Johnny asks, "What is oral?"
Grandpa says, "I say fuck you, she says fuck you, too."
Husband and Wife on 10th anniversary. The wife undresses and says: "What did you think when I stripped 10 years ago?"33 Sex Jokes
He says: "I wanted to fuck your brains out and suck your tits dry".
She says: "What are you thinking now?"
"Looks like I did a pretty good job!"
"Tell me a bedtime story."48 Bedtime Jokes
"That's my favourite."
A man is lost. He decides to stop and ask for directions at a farm.25 Sex Jokes
Before he knocks on the door, he saw in the window an old, naked couple. The wife was pulling her breasts, and the husband was jerking off. Horrified, the man runs across the street to another house.
The homeowner tells the man, "They're deaf. She's saying 'Milk the cows,' and he's saying 'Go fuck yourself.'"