1) Never arrive on time, or you will be stamped a beginner. 2) Don't say anything until the meeting is half over; this stamps you as being wise. 3) Be as vague as possible; this prevents irritating the others. 4) When in doubt, suggest that a subcommittee be appointed. 5) Be the first to move for adjournment; this will make you popular - it's what everyone is waiting for.
How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?
1) "I want a detailed memo about this issue till tomorrow's morning." 2) "You were supposed to have changed that light bulb last week!" 3) "We haven't got a policy on that". 4) "I am on my way to a very important meeting, so we'll discuss it some other time." 5) Three. Two to find out if it needs changing, and one to tell an employee to change it.