Spitting Jokes
Top Jokes about Spitting

What's the difference between love, true love and showing off?

Spitting, swallowing and gargling.

There were three babies in a woman's womb, and they were discussing what they would like to be when they were out in the world and grown up.

The first one said "I wanna be a plumber." The others laughed at this, and asked why he wanted be be a plumber. He replied, "So I can fix the pipes in here, it's kinda leaky."

The second one said "I wanna be an electrician." The others thought this was kind of silly too and asked why. The second baby answered, "So I can get some lights in here, its dark!"

The third one said, "I wanna be a boxer." The others thought this was hilarious, and laughed for a full five minutes, before asking, "Why in God's name do you want to be a boxer?"

He replied, "So," he said proudly, "I can beat the hell out of that bald guy who keeps coming in here and spitting on us.

"Mommy, Mommy! When is the pool going to be ready?"

"Shut up and spit!"

Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest Stamps?

They had pictures of lawyers on them and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.