There was a boy who had to use an outhouse and he hated it sooo bad. One day it started to rain really hard and it got the bank all slippery and wet so he decided to push it off. He did it and later that night his father asked him if he pushed off the outhouse.
He said: "Yes."
His father told his son to come with him to get his whipping.
The boy said: "George Washington didn't get in trouble when he chopped down the cherry tree because he was honest."
The boys father said: "but George Washingtons father wasn't in the cherry tree when he chopped it down."
Father: "How did you do in your tests?"
Son: "I did what George Washington did!"
Father: "What was that?"
Son: "Went down in history!"
What is the difference between George Washington, Richard Nixon, and your mother-in-law?
Washington couldn't tell a lie, Nixon couldn't tell the truth and your mother-in-law doesn't know the difference.
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: "Save the women!"
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: "Screw the women!"
Bill Clinton's asks excitedly: "Do we have time?