An Alcoholic, a Chain Smoker and a Homosexual go to the doctor.
The doctor says: "If any of you indulge one more time you'll die."
As they walk home they pass a bar. The Alcoholic has a shot of whiskey, falls off his stool stone cold dead. His friends are shocked.
As they walk along they come upon a cigarette butt lying on the ground still burning. The Homosexual looks at the Chain Smoker and says: "If you bend over to pick that up, we're both dead!"
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, "You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's so much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own ... so does she.