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Top Jokes about Actors




How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

1) Five. One to climb the ladder, four to say "That should be me up there!"
2) None. The stunt double does it for them.


How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.


A farmer says to his wife: "If you had bigger tit’s, I’d get rid of the cow!"

Wife replies: "If you had a bigger cock, I’d get rid of the tractor driver!"


Proposal

Why was the goose fired from the pillow factory? He kept breaking down.     ~ Bill Gates O Hell


A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office.

Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line."

"Well, I'm a lawyer, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front of me, do you?"





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