Vacationing in Hawaii, two priests decide to wear casual clothes so they won't be identified as clergy. They buy Hawaiian shirts and sandals, and soon head for the beach.
They notice a gorgeous blond in a tiny bikini. "Good afternoon, Fathers" she says as she strolls by.
The men are stunned. How does she know they are clergy? Later that day, they buy even wilder attire consisting of surfer shorts, tie dyed T-shirts, and dark glasses.
The next day, they return to the beach. The same fabulous blond, now wearing a string bikini, passes by, nods politely at them and says, "Good morning Fathers."
"Just a minute young lady.", says one of the priests. "We are priests and proud of it, but how in the world did you know?"
The blonde replies, "Don't you recognize me? I'm sister Katherine from the convent."
Billy Bob and Luther were talking one afternoon when Billy Bob tells Luther, "Ya know, I reckon I'm 'bout ready for a vacation. Only this year I'm gonna do it a little different!
The last few years, I took your advice about where to go. Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Earline got pregnant.
Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Earline got pregnant again.
Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Earline didn't get pregnant again."
Luther asks Billy Bob, "So, what you gonna do this year that's different?"
For his 40th birthday, a guy decided to go visit his teenage buddy Bob who had become a scuba instructor in Hawaii.
His first day there Bob invited him to ride along when the class went out that day, promising he'd have a great time.
Awesome, he thought, so off they went.
The class is taking their first solo swims that day, suddenly one of them pops to the surface, his suit somewhat inflated.
Bob roars with laughter as another pops up, then another.
Through his tears Bob says, "Works every time!"
He asks Bob, "What's going on? "
Bob says, "Near the end of class I invite them all over to my place for a party. I make a big pot of chili and break out my special homebrew. The next day I watch them pop to the surface, one by one!" ~ Jens