How do you know that the driver driving toward you is a physicist?
He has a red sticker on his bumper, saying: "If this sticker is blue, you are driving too fast."
A mother has 3 girls, they all got married, but she wants to know how the sex is, so she says that after the night on the honeymoon, they write a postcard saying how it went.
The 1st girl writes: "M&M's."
Puzzled, the women buys a pack of M&M's and reads the slogan "It melts in your mouth, not in your hand."
The 2nd girl writes: "Campbell's soup."
Again the mom buys some cambles soup and reads: "Mmm ... mmm ... good."
3 weeks pass and the 3rd girl finally writes: "Ford."
The mom goes to her ford and reads on a sticker: "The best never stop."