96 jokes about wives
32 → Joke
A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini
on the rocks.
After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, then orders another double martini.
After he finishes that it, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders another one.
The bartender says: "Look, buddy, I'll bring you martini's all night long - but you got to tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill."
The customer replies: "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I will know it's time to go home!"
56 → Joke
Two guys and a girl were sitting at a bar
talking about their lives.
The first guy said, "I'm a YUPPIE
. You know, Young Urban Professional."
The second guy responded, "I'm a DINK
. You know, Double Income No Kids."
They then asked the woman, "What are you?"
She replied: "I'm a WIFE. You know, Wash, Iron, Fuck
28 → Joke
was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
When the kids
are in college
63 → Joke
had his credit card stolen. He however decided not to report it because the thief
was spending less than his wife did.
110 → Joke
First guy proudly: "My wife's an angel
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
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