Ugly jokes

Yo momma is so ugly, she makes blind children cry.

Yo momma is so ugly, even the tide won't come back in.

Yo momma is so ugly, when she got in the tub, the water jumped out.

A man is lying on the beach, sun bathing, wearing nothing but a cap over his dick.

An ugly woman is passing and remarks: "If you were any sort of a gentleman, you would lift your hat to a lady!"

He replied: "If you were any sort of a lady, the hat would lift itself!"

What's the quickest way to lose 190 pounds of ugly fat?

Divorce him.