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Teacher jokes

115 jokes about teachers


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cat:2
"A philosopher," said the theologian, "is like a blind man in a darkened room looking for a black cat that isn't there."

"That's right," the philosopher replied, "and if he were a theologian, he'd find it."

13    


boy,soccer
Little Johnny was busy doing his homework. As his mother approached she heard him say:

"One and one, the son-of-a-bitch is two."
"Two and two, the son-of-a-bitch is four."
"Three and three"

His mother interrupted, asking where he had learned this way of doing math. Little Johnny remarked that his teacher Ms. Margo taught him. His mother was rather upset and told him to stop the homework.

The next day she stormed into Little Johnny's classroom and confronted Ms. Margo. She told her about Little Johnny's different way of doing math, and his claims that Ms. Margo taught it that way to the class.

The teacher was flabbergasted. She said that she couldn't understand why Little Johnny had said that. Then suddenly, Ms Margo exclaimed, "Oh, I know, here in school we say: one and one, the sum-of-which is two!"

68    


Proposal

Little Johnny: "I'm not going back to school ever again!"

Mom: "Why not?"

Little Johnny: "The teacher doesn't know a thing, all she does is ask questions!"

3    


Proposal

Teacher: "I told you to write this poem out 10 times to improve your handwriting and you've only done it 7 times?"

Little Johnny: "Looks like my counting isn't too good either!"

7    


Proposal

Teacher: "If 1+ 1 = 2 and 2+ 2 = 4, what is 4+ 4?"

Little Johnny: "That's not fair you answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!"

4    


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