7 jokes about stones11 → Joke
Jesus30 → Joke
came across an adulteress
crouching in a corner with a crowd around her preparing to stone her to death. Jesus stopped them and said, "Let he who is without sin
cast the first stone."
Suddenly a woman at the back of the crowd fired off a stone at the adulteress. At which point Jesus looked over and said, "Mother
! Sometimes you really tick me off!"
27 → Joke
, a Chain Smoker and a Homosexual
go to the doctor.
The doctor says: "If any of you indulge one more time you'll die."
As they walk home they pass a bar. The Alcoholic has a shot of whiskey, falls off his stool stone cold dead. His friends are shocked.
As they walk along they come upon a cigarette butt lying on the ground still burning. The Homosexual looks at the Chain Smoker and says: "If you bend over to pick that up, we're both dead!"
20 → Joke
Two men were walking home after a party
and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery
just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows. Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.
"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death
... we thought you were a ghost
! What are you doing working here so late at night?"
"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"
8 → Joke
and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetary back to the car, the little girl asked: "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"
"Of course not, dear." replied the mother, "Why would you think that?"
"The tombstone back there said 'Here lies a lawyer
and an honest man.'"