Stealing - 4 jokes
What is the difference between baseball
In baseball, if you're caught stealing, you're out.
was riding accross the plain when he heard shouting from a nearby house. So he went over to investigate and after searching the house, found a young maiden lying naked
in bed, with her four limbs tied to the bed corners.
"Oh thank god" she cried: "you have got to help me, two men came by and killed my husband then took it in turn to ravish me before stealing all our money, help me please!"
The cowboy thought for a second, then as he unzipped his fly and took down his trousers he said: "Maam, this just aint your lucky day!"
Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury aquitted him. Later that day Carlson came back to the judge who had presided at the hearing.
"Your honor," he said, "I wanna get out a warrant for my dirty lawyer
"Why?" asked the judge. "He won your aquittal. Why do you want to arrest him?"
"Well, your honor," replied Carlson, "I didn't have the money to pay his fee, so he went and took the car
A housewife accused a maid for stealing her panties.1
In her defence, she said: "Madam, I don't wear panties even if you ask sir!"