One Sunday afternoon, a guy walks into a bar
with his pet dog
. The bartender
said, "Sorry, pal. No pets allowed."
The man replied, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you'll see."
The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game.
The guy said, "Watch. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips." The Jets keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.
"Wow! That's one hell of a dog you got there. What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?" asked the bartender.
The man replied, "I don't know. I've only had him for seven years."
To give you an idea of the kind of season we've had, the person who handled our side of the scoreboard was sick
for three weeks and nobody noticed.
The Perfect Breakfast
As a Man
You’re sitting at the table and your son is on the cover of Wheaties, your mistress
is on the cover of Playboy, and your wife
is on the back of the milk carton.