Funny · Short · New · Top Proposal
So a boy is studying vocabulary and come upon the words confident and confidential. The boy unable to determine what it means goes to his dad and says2
"Dad, whats the difference between connfident and confidential?"
So the Dad says "well I am confident that you are my son, but its confidential that your friend jimmy is also my son.
Three girls are at work, and their female boss is leaving early for the day. The brunette also suggests to leave early as there boss will not notice. So that afternoon, they all leave early.
One spends time with her son and enjoys her time off.
The redhead does her gardening and has an early night.
goes home and hears sounds in her bedroom, she walks upstairs quietly open her bedroom door and finds her boss in bed with her hubby, shuts the door and leaves the house.
On next day, the brunette goes on asking: "Shall we leave early again today?" The blonde says: "No way I nearly got caught!
Ben invited his mother
over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful Ben's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between Ben and his roommate and this only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Ben and the roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, Ben volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Allison and I are just roommates."
About a week later, Allison came to Ben and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle
. "You don't suppose she took it, do you?"
Ben said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure."
So he sat down and wrote: "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you 'did not' take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."
Several days later, Ben received a letter from his mother which read:
"Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Allison, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Allison. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom"
A little boy
are in a bathtub, and are naked
because they are too little too understand anything like that. The girl and boy ask each other: "What's that?" and they both reply: "I'll ask my parents."
So the boy goes home and asks his dad what it is. The dad looks solemnly at him and says: "Son, that's your car
. You park it in a girls garage
The girl goes home and says: "what's that?" The mother says: "That's your garage. dont let any boy park his car in it."
The next day they are again in the tub. The boy says its a car and remembers what his dad said. So he begins to put it in the girls "garage". But then the girl remembers what her mom said.
5 minutes later, the girl comes to the mom with blood all over her. The mother asks her what was wrong and she said: "Mommy, a boy tried to put his car in my garage, but I popped his two back tires."
was completing a temperance sermon
: with great expression he said, "If I had all the beer
in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river
With even greater emphasis, he said, "And if I had all the wine
in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river."
And then, finally, he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river." He sat down.
The song leader then stood very cautiously and announced with a pleasant smile, "For our closing song, let us sing Hymn #365: 'Shall We Gather At the River.'"