Sleeping - 20 jokes
was given a hotel room next to one occupied by honeymooners
The walls were thin, and the sounds of sustained sexual frenzy poured through. Finally the salesman could stand it no longer. He pounded on the walls, yelling, "Knock it off, there's other people trying to get some sleep!"
From the other room came a weak, faltering male voice which said, "Yell louder, mister, she can't hear you!"
who was known as Churchill
's main rival in parliament
was giving a speech
. Churchill, with his usual enthusiasm for his rival, dozed off while the lady was speaking. She stopped her speech and awoke Sir Winston by yelling, "Mr. Churchill, must you sleep
while I talk?" Churchill sleepily replied, "No, ma'am. I do so purely by choice."
"Dad, whats the difference between a pussy
and a cunt
?" a young son asks.
"Look at this," says dad, as he lifts the sheets on his naked sleeping mother, "thats a pussy son."
"It's wonderful dad, can I touch it?"
"No son" says Dad. "If you touch the pussy you'll wake the cunt up!"