14 jokes about silence
What's the best thing about a blow job?3 blow jobs jokes
Ten minutes silence.
70 idiot jokes
"If there are any idiots
in the room, will they please stand up" said the sarcastic teacher
After a long silence, one freshman
rose to his feet.
"Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" enquired the teacher with a sneer.
"Well, actually I don't," said the student
, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."
50 cat jokes
Lenny went on vacation
and asked Bobby to watch over his house. About a week later, Lenny calls home and asked "How's my cat
Bobby hesitated and sadly told Lenny his cat died.
"What?! You shouldn't have broken the news to me like that! You should have done it slowly. The first time I called, you should have told me she was on the roof
. The second time I called, you should have said there was no way to get her down. The third time I called, you should have told me that you tried to get her off the roof, but she fell down and died," explained Lenny.
Bobby apologized and went about his day.
About a week later, Lenny called again and asked "How's my Granny
There was a long silence and then Bobby replied. "Well, she's on the roof."
33 death jokes
A couple of New Jersey hunters
are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator
: "My friend is dead
! What can I do?"
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
18 Catholic jokesNext page Jokes
men and a Catholic woman were having coffee.
The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son
is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him Father."
The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a bishop. When he walks into a room people call him Your Grace."
The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a cardinal. When he enters a room everyone says Your Eminence."
The fourth Catholic man chirps, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him Your Holiness."
Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well ...?"
She replies, "I have a gorgeous daughter
. When she walks into a room, people say, ... Oh God