Little Johnny came home from school one day and went by his mom's room. The door was open, so he looked in and saw his mom lying on the bed naked moaning and touching herself saying, "Ooh, I need a man! I need a man!"
The next day, Little Johnny got home from school and saw his mom lying on the bed naked with a naked guy on top of her. So Little Johnny ran to his room, stripped down naked, and started to touch himself, while moaning, "Ooh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"
A mother has 3 girls, they all got married, but she wants to know how the sex is, so she says that after the night on the honeymoon, they write a postcard saying how it went.
The 1st girl writes: M&M's.
Puzzled, the women buys a pack of M&M's and reads the slogan "It melts in your mouth, not in your hand."
The 2nd girl writes: Campbell's soup.
Again the mom buys some cambles soup and reads, "Mmm ... mmm ... good."
3 weeks pass and the 3rd girl finally writes: Ford
The mom goes to her ford jeep and reads "The best never stop."
How can you tell if your husband is dead?
A young man with a wild and multi-coloured hairstyle sits next to an old man on a park bench. The old man stares at the young man.
Little Johnny came home from school one day and went by his mom's room. The door was open, so he looked in and saw his mom lying on the bed naked moaning and touching herself saying, "Ooh, I need a man! I need a man!"