70 jokes about sam
35 → Joke
Vacationing in Hawaii
, two priests
decide to wear casual clothes
so they won't be identified as clergy. They buy Hawaiian shirts and sandals, and soon head for the beach
They notice a gorgeous blond
in a tiny bikini
. "Good afternoon, Fathers" she says as she strolls by.
The men are stunned. How does she know they are clergy? Later that day, they buy even wilder attire consisting of surfer shorts, tie dyed T-shirts, and dark glasses.
The next day, they return to the beach. The same fabulous blond, now wearing a string bikini, passes by, nods politely at them and says, "Good morning Fathers."
"Just a minute young lady.", says one of the priests. "We are priests and proud of it, but how in the world did you know?"
The blonde replies, "Don't you recognize me? I'm sister
Katherine from the convent."
39 → Joke
left work one Friday afternoon. Being payday
, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting
with the boys and spent his entire paycheck. When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife
and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.
Finally, his wife stopped the nagging and simply said to him, "How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?"
To which he replied, "That would be fine with me."
Monday went by and he didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.
Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye
Politicians34 → Joke
are like diapers
They should be changed frequently ... and for the same reason
33 → Joke
I was sitting in the waiting room of the hospital
after my wife had gone into labor and the nurse
walked out and said to the man sitting next to me, "Congratulations sir, you’re the new father
The man replied, "How about that, I work
for the Doublemint Chewing Gum Company." The man then followed the woman to his wife’s room.
About an hour later, the same nurse entered the waiting room and announced that Mr. Smith’s wife has just had triplets.
Mr. Smith stood up and said, "Well, how do ya like that, I work for the 3M Company."
The gentleman that was sitting next to me then got up and started to leave. When I asked him why he was leaving, he remarked, "I think I need a breath of fresh air." The man continued, "I work for 7-UP."
25 → JokeNext page Back to home
Why do men
they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs
chase cars they have no intention of driving