71 jokes about sam
8 definitely jokes
The pre-school teacher says, "We're going to do vocabulary today. Who can use the word 'definitely
' in a sentence?"
Mary raises her hand and exclaims, "Me me me!"
The teacher says, "Go ahead, what's the sentence?"
Mary replies, "The sky is definitely blue."
"That's good, Mary," says the teacher, "but the sky can also be gray or white."
Sam raises his hand and states, "Grass is definitely green."
The teacher says, "That's good, Sam, but grass can be brown, too."
raises his hand and asks, "Do farts
The teacher says, "No Johnny, why do you ask that?"
Little Johnny replies, "Well, I definitely shit my pants
8 prostitute jokes16 tooth jokes
were riding around town with a sign
on top of their car that said: "TWO PROSTITUTES - $50.00."
A policeman stopped them and told them they'd either have to remove the sign or go to jail.
Just then, another car passed with a sign saying, "JESUS SAVES."
One of the girls asked the cop
, "Why don't you stop them?"
"Well, that's a little different," the cop smiled. "Their sign pertains to religion
The two ladies frowned as they took their sign down and drove off.
The following day the cop noticed the same two ladies driving around with a large sign on their car again. This time the sign read: "TWO ANGELS
SEEKING PETER - $50.00."
19 blonde jokes
, a brunette
, and a redhead all work for a construction crew. One day, they were on their lunch
break, sitting on a beam thirty stories high. They all note that they've had the same lunch for as long as they were on the job. They agreed if they opened their lunchboxes and found the same lunch, they would all hurl themselves off the beam.
The next day, the police are investigating the scene where the three women
fell. When the police asked the husbands
of the women, the brunette and the redhead's husbands both said, "If I had known, I would have given her something different." However, the blonde's husband said, "Don't look at me, she packs her own lunch."
3 multitasking jokesNext page Jokes
One good thing about getting older is that multitasking
You can sneeze, piss and shit yourself all at the same time!