123 jokes about rounds
38 → Joke13 → Joke
A married man was having an affair
with his secretary
. One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they made passionate love all afternoon. Exhausted from the wild sex
, they fell asleep, awakening around 8:00 pm. As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied. He slipped into his shoes and drove home.
"Where have you been?" demanded his wife when he entered the house.
"Darling, I can't lie to you. I've been having an affair with my secretary and we've been having sex all afternoon. I fell asleep and didn't wake up until eight o'clock."
The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, "You lying bastard! You've been playing golf
39 → Joke
up a steep, narrow mountain road
. A woman
is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG
The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH
They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road and dies.
If only men would listen.
38 → Joke
There was an earthquake
at the Christian Brothers' monastery and it was leveled. All fifty brothers were transported to heaven
at the one time.
At the Pearly Gates, St. Peter said, "Let's go through the entry test as a group. Now, first question. How many of you have played around with little boys
Forty-nine hands went up.
"Right!" said St. Peter. "You forty-nine can go down to Hell
. Oh, and take that deaf bastard with you!"
29 → Joke
Dianne goes to the doctor
, and says, "Doctor, I've got a bit of a problem. I'll have to take my clothes off to show you."
The doctor tells her to go behind the screen and disrobe. She does so, and the doctor goes round to see her when she is ready.
"Well, what is it?" he asks.
"It's a bit embarrassing," she replies. "These two green circles have appeared on the inside of my thighs."
The doctor examines her and finally admits he has no idea what the cause is. Then he suddenly asks, "Is your boyfriend
blushes and says, "Well, actually he is."
"That's the problem," the doctor says. "Tell him his earrings
aren't real gold."
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