53 jokes about rinks
12 → Joke
One day a rather inebriated ice fisherman
drilled a hole in the ice and peered into the hole and a loud voice said, "There are no fish
He walked several yards away and drilled another hole and peered into the hole and again the voice said, "There's no fish down there."
He then walked about 50 yards away and drilled another hole and again the voice said, "There's no fish down there."
He looked up into the sky and asked, "God
, is that you?"
"No, you idiot," the voice said, "it's the rink manager."
40 → Joke
were sharing drinks while discussing their wives
"Do you and your wife ever do it doggie style?" .
"Well ... not exactly." his friend replied, "She's more into the trick dog
aspect of it."
"Oh, I see, kinky, huh?"
"Well ... not exactly ... I sit up and beg and she rolls over and plays dead."
48 → JokeProposal
Bob works hard and spends most evenings bowling
or playing basketball at the gym. His wife
thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Bob! How ya doin?" His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no," says Bob. "He's on my bowling team."
When they are seated, a waitress asks Bob if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, "How did she know that you drink Budweiser?" "She's in the Ladies' Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them."
then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Bob and starts to rub herself all over him and says, "Hi Bobbie. Want your usual table dance, big boy?" Bob's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Bob follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. Bob tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.
She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every four letter word in the book. The cabby turns around and says, "Geez Bob, you picked up a real bitch
A man walks into a bar and asks for the strongest drink they have.5 → Joke
the bartender says to the man 'bad day, huh?'
the man replies, 'yeah, i just found out my oldest son is gay'
the next day the man walks into the bar again and asks for a double of what he had the last time the bartender goes 'bad day again mate?'
the man replies 'yep, just found out my youngest son is gay'
a week after this the man walks into the bar again and asks for triple of his last drink the bartender is shocked and asks 'doesn't anyone in your family like chicks?'
'YEAH' says the man, 'MY WIFE!'
27 → Joke
Patty loves to drink at the local bar
, but his wife
disapproves of this. One night, he's at the bar and he gets extremely drunk
. He tries to stand up, but immedeatly falls to the floor. He tries this a few more times, but each time he falls to the floor. People offered to help him, but he said no each time. He finally ended up dragging himself home and sneaking into bed, thinking his wife would never catch him.
The next morning, Patty's wife says, "Patty, you son of a bitch
! You were at the bar last night drinking
Patty was confused. "How did you find out?"
"The bar called. You left your wheelchair