Remote jokes

How can you tell if your husband is dead?

The sex is the same but you get to use the remote.

Why don't men do laundry?

Cause the washer and dryer don't run on remote control!

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.

"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."

In a world without walls and fences - who needs Windows and Gates?

How do you get a man to do sit-ups?

Put the remote control between his toes.