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A Chinese family of 5, named Chu, Bu, Hu, Su and Fu decided to immigrate to the United States.

In order to get a visa, they had to adapt their names to American standards.

Chu became Chuck.

Bu became Buck.

Hu became Huck.

Su and Fu decided to stay in China!

12     Chinese jokes


One night a man and a woman are both at a bar knocking back a few beers. They start talking and come to realize that they're both doctors. After about an hour, the man says to the woman, "Hey. How about if we sleep together tonight. No strings attached. It'll just be one night of fun." The woman doctor agrees to it.

So they go back to her place and he goes in the bedroom. She goes in the bathroom and starts scrubbing up like she's about to go into the operating room. She scrubs for a good 10 minutes. Finally she goes in the bedroom and they have sex for an hour or so.

Afterwards, the man says to the woman, "You're a surgeon, aren't you?" "Yeah, how did you know?" The man says, "I could tell by the way you scrubbed up before we started." "Oh, that makes sense", says the woman. " You're an anesthesiologist aren't you?" "Yeah", says the man , a bit surprised. "How did you know?" The woman answers, "Because I didn't feel a thing."

35     doctor jokes


At the nursing home, Abe and Edna had struck up a romantic relationship. Since both of them were in their eighties, their physical contact was rather limited. However, every evening as they sat together on the sofa, Edna would unzip Abe's fly, pull out his penis and hold it in her hand for twenty minutes. This satisfied the two of them adequately.

One day, Abe told Edna it was all off. He told her he was leaving her for Mabel - one of the other old dears at the nursing home. Naturally, Edna was a little miffed.

"Heavens! What's she got that I haven't got?'' she asks.

''Parkinson's,'' said Abe.

20     parkinson's jokes


Do you know what the death rate around here is?

One per person.

34     death jokes


What do you call a man with 99% of his brain missing?

Castrated.

31     man jokes






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