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How many violists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. They're not small enough to fit.

12     light bulb jokes


How do you save a man from drowning?

Take your foot off his head.

12     drowning jokes


What does Princess Diana and a bottle of French wine have in common?

They both came from France in a wooden box.

15     Princess Diana jokes


What not to say to the nice policeman:

Hey, you must've been doing about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good Job!

12     policeman jokes


How many philosophers does it take to change a light bulb?

1) "Hmmm ... well there's an interesting question isn't it?"
2) "Define 'light bulb' ..."
3) "How can you be sure it needs changing?"
4) Three. One to change it and two to stand around arguing over whether or not the light bulb exists.

5     light bulb jokes






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