9 jokes about prostitutes
33 man jokes
There was a prostitute on the beach
without any arms or legs, and crying
. A man
came along and asked her what the matter was. She tells him that she has not been hugged before, so he picks her up and hugs
The next day she is still there crying, the same man comes along and asks her what the matter is. She tells him that she has not been kissed before, so he picks her up and kisses her.
The next day she's still there crying, and same man comes along again. He asks her sternly what the matter is and she tells him that she has not been fucked
before. So the man picks her up, walks to the end of the pier, and throws her in the sea and says: "Now you're fucked."
17 Catholic jokes
Sister Catherine was asking all the Catholic
school children in fourth grade what they want to be when they grow up.
Little Sheila said, "When I grow up, I want to be a prostitute!"
Sister Catherine's eyes grow wide and she barked, "What did you say?!"
"A prostitute!" Sheila exclaimed.
Sister Catherine breathed a sight of relief and said "Whew! Thank God! I thought you said 'A Protestant
21 sex jokes
When I was in London
a few months ago, I was approached by a prostitute as I left a club
on one of the back streets of Soho. Mainly interested in checking the rate of exchange I assure you, I asked: "How much?"
"It'll cost ya twenty quid" replied the tart.
"American Express?" I inquired.
She gave me an appraising look and said: "You can go as fast as you like" .
11 sign jokes
Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign
on top of their car that said: "TWO PROSTITUTES - $50.00."
A policeman stopped them and told them they'd either have to remove the sign or go to jail.
Just then, another car passed with a sign saying, "JESUS SAVES."
One of the girls asked the cop
, "Why don't you stop them?"
"Well, that's a little different," the cop smiled. "Their sign pertains to religion
The two ladies frowned as they took their sign down and drove off.
The following day the cop noticed the same two ladies driving around with a large sign on their car again. This time the sign read: "TWO ANGELS
SEEKING PETER - $50.00."
2 leper jokesNext page Jokes
What did the leper
say to the prostitute?
Keep the tip