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Teacher: "Did you parents help you with these homework problems?"

Little Johnny: "No I got them all wrong by myself!"

8     Little Johnny jokes


"Doctor! I have a serious problem, I can never remember what I just said."

"When did you first notice this problem?"

"What problem?"

2     remembering jokes


Psychiatrist: "What's your problem?"

Patient: "I think I'm a chicken."

Psychiatrist: "How long has this been going on?"

Patient: "Ever since I was an egg!"

19     chicken jokes


When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 C.

The Russians used a pencil.

27     NASA jokes


A mathematician and a physicist were asked the following question: Suppose you walked by a burning house and saw a hydrant and a hose not connected to the hydrant. What would you do?

P: I would attach the hose to the hydrant, turn on the water, and put out the fire.
M: I would attach the hose to the hydrant, turn on the water, and put out the fire.

Then they were asked this question: Suppose you walked by a house and saw a hose connected to a hydrant. What would you do?

P: I would keep walking, as there is no problem to solve.
M: I would disconnect the hose from the hydrant and set the house on fire, reducing the problem to a previously solved form.

16     mathematician jokes






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