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Praying jokes

Praying - 12 jokes



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In Jerusalem, a female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Wailing Wall to pray, twice a day, everyday, for a long, long time. So she went to check it out. She went to the Wailing Wall and there he was!

She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave, she approached him for an interview.

"I'm Rebecca Smith from CNN. Sir, how long have you been coming to the Wall and praying?"

"For about 60 years."

"60 years! That's amazing! What do you pray for?"

"I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Muslims. I pray for all the hatred to stop and I pray for all our children to grow up in safety and friendship."

"How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?"

"Like I'm talking to a fuckin' wall."

24     wall jokes


A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep.

The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

16     blind jokes


Little Johnny's family is sitting at the dinner table.

Father, "Can you please pray for dinner!"

Little Johnny, "Dear God. Please, please send clothes for all those poor ladies in Dad’s computer. Amen!"

22     Little Johnny jokes


A sinking ship's captain: "Does anyone know how to pray?"

A priest says he can pray.

Captain: "Ok priest, you pray. Everyone else will wear a life jacket. We are short of one."

6     captain jokes


A Baptist missionary in Africa was just walking when he heard the ominous padding of a lion behind him.

"Oh Lord," prayed the missionary, "Grant in thy goodness that the lion walking behind me is a good Christian lion."

In the silence that followed, the missionary heard the lion praying too: "Oh Lord," he prayed, "I thank thee for the meal which I am about to enjoy."

5     missionary jokes






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