What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?22 Blonde Jokes
Run like hell ... she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?36 Blonde Jokes
Pull the pin and throw it back.
"Dad, whats the difference between a pussy and a cunt?" a young son asks.68 Pussy Jokes
"Look at this," says dad, as he lifts the sheets on his naked sleeping mother, "thats a pussy son."
"It's wonderful dad, can I touch it?"
"No son" says Dad. "If you touch the pussy you'll wake the cunt up!"
3 guys go camping in their new tent.45 Dick Jokes
After a night's sleep, the guy sleeping on the left of the tent wakes up in a cold sweat and tells the others "I had the most horrible nightmare that somebody was trying to pull my dick off!"
The guy sleeping on the right says "Weird! I had the exact same dream!"
The guy sleeping in the middle says "I had a dream that I was skiing ..."
Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, "Where in the hell have you been?"38 Tattoo Jokes
Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo."
"A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"
"I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates," he said proudly.
"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head in disdain. "Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred Dollar bill tattooed on his privates?"
"Well, one, I like to watch my money grow. Two, once in a while I like to play with my money. Three, I like how money feels in my hand. And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want."