12 jokes about pills
3 dentist jokes
A man goes to a dentist
to have a tooth pulled. The dentist pulls out a freezing needle
to give the man a shot.
"No way! No needles! I hate needles," the patient said.
The dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas.
The man objects again: "I can't do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating me!"
The dentist then asks the patient if he has any objection to taking a pill.
"No objection," the patient says. "I'm fine with pills."
The dentist then returns and says: "Here's a Viagra
The patient says: "Wow! I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer!"
"It doesn't" said the dentist, "But it will give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth!"
13 airplane jokes
An airliner is coming into land at an airport
obscured by fog. Visibility is practically nil, the ILS system is on the blink, so the pilot
has to land on wits alone. "Flaps, check," he says to the copilot, "Landing
Gear, check. Altitude, check. Right, we're going in. Hold on." The plane
lands and comes to a screeching, grinding halt; just short of the edge of the runway
. "Holy Cow!" exclaims the pilot, "This must be the shortest runway I've ever landed on!" The copilot looks left and right and says "Yeah, and about the widest, too ..."
38 shit jokesProposal
One day two boys were walking through the woods
when they saw some rabbit shit
. One of the boys said: "What is that?"
pills," said the other boy "Eat them and they'll make you smarter."
So he ate them and said: "These taste like shit."
"See," said the other boy, "you're already getting smarter."
Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight.6 Short jokes
When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills.
The son said: "I don't think you should take one Dad, they're very strong and very expensive."
"How much?" asked Grandpa.
"$10.00 a pill," Answered the son.
"I don't care:" said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow."
Later the next morning, the son found $110.00 under the pillow. He called Grandpa and said: "I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00."
"I know," said Grandpa "The hundred is from Grandma!"
5 solomon jokesNext page Jokes
Two women came before wise King Solomon
, dragging between them a young man.
"This young man agreed to marry
my daughter," said one.
"No! He agreed to marry my daughter," said the other.
And so they haggled before the King, until he called for silence.
"Bring me my biggest sword," said Solomon, "and I shall hew the young man in half. Each of you shall receive a half."
"Sounds good to me," said the first lady.
But the other woman said, "Oh Sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman's daughter marry him."
The wise king did not hesitate a moment. "This man must marry the first lady's daughter," he proclaimed.
"But she was willing to hew him in two!" exclaimed the king's court.
"Indeed," said wise King Solomon. "That shows she is the true mother-in-law