Music jokes

Why did Bill Clinton stop playing the saxophone?

He was too busy playing the harmonica.

A customer at a supermarket asked Ranjeet, the shelf packer if he could buy half a cucumber.

Ranjeet, went to his boss and told him: "There is an idiot who wants 1/2 a cucumber".

Unfortunately the customer had followed him and was standing right behind him. When Ranjeet realised this, he quickly added "Oh and this gentleman wants the other 1/2".

Later the boss said he was very impressed by his fast thinking and asked him where he came from.

"I come from Chatsworth" Ranjeet replied and quickly added "Nothing much comes from there except musicians and prostitutes."

To which the boss said: "Oh really? My wife comes from Chatsworth".

The quick response from Ranjeet was: "Is that so? What instrument does she play?"

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice!

What's brown and sits on a piano bench?

Beethoven's First Movement.

What do Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common?

They both live off dead Beatles.