Morning jokes

This morning as I was buttoning my shirt, a button fell off. After that, I picked up my briefcase, and the handle fell off. Then I went to open the door, and the doorknob fell off. I went to get into my car, and the door handle came off in my hand. Now I'm afraid to pee.

What does a blonde do with her asshole in the morning?

Pack his lunch and send him to work.

Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill Clinton first thing in the morning?

She wants to be the first lady.

Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?

Because they don't have balls to scratch.

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"

Woman: "Unfertilized."