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Money jokes

65 jokes about money


What are a woman's four favorite animals?

A mink in the closet, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bedroom, and an ass to pay for it all.

9     0

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money
Some Somalians open fire on an oil tanker, take hostage the 25 crew and hijack the vessel carrying $100million of oil ...

I 'borrow' some music, TV and films from the internet and they want to sue me for piracy?

This world is messed up.

6     2


money
A man walks into the toy store to get a Barbie doll for his daughter. So he asks the assistant, as you would, "How much is Barbie?"

"Well," she says, "we have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.00."

"Hey, hang on," the guy asks, "why is Divorced Barbie $265.00 when all the others are only $19.95?"

"Yeah, well, it's like this ... Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's boat, Ken's furniture ..."

28     9


money
A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight for their life and their money.

The gang was very happy to escape. "It ain't so bad," one crook noted. "We got $25 between us."

The boss screamed: "I warned you to stay clear of lawyers ... we had $100 when we broke in!"

6     2


Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Kentucky State Lottery?

The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.

20     9

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