Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?18 Blonde Jokes
So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.
A husband walks into the bedroom holding two aspirin and a glass of water.21 Headache Jokes
His wife asks, "What's that for?" "It's for your headache." "I don't have a headache."
He replies, "Gotcha!"
The National Institutes of Health have announced that they will no longer be using rats for medical experimentation. In their place, they will use attorneys. They have given three reasons for this decision:16 Rat Jokes
1. There are now more attorneys than there are rats.
2. The medical researchers don't become as emotionally attached to the attorneys as they did to the rats.
3. No matter how hard you try, there are some things that even rats won't do.
Elton John wasn't the only one who composed a song for Diana:16 Princess Diana Jokes
1) Roxette - "Crash! Boom! Bang!"
2) Michael Jackson - "Blood on the dashboard!"
A lecturer teaching medicine was giving a classoom observation. He took out a jar of yellow liquid. "This," he explained, "is urine. To be a doctor, you have to be observant of color, smell, sight, and taste."26 Urine JokesNext page Jokes
After saying so, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into his mouth. His class watched in amazement, most in disgust. But being the good students that they were, the jar was passed, and one by one, they dipped their finger into the jar and put it into their mouths.
After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "If any of you had been observant, you would have noticed that I put my second finger into the jar and my third finger into my mouth."