Two
deaf people get married. During the first week of marriage, they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom when they turn off the lights because they can't see each other using sign language. After several nights of fumbling around and misunderstandings, the
wife decides to find a solution.
"Honey," she signs, "Why don't we agree on some simple signals? For instance, at night, if you want to have
sex with me, reach over and squeeze my left
breast one time. If you don't want to have sex, reach over and squeeze my right breast one time."
The husband thinks this is a great idea and signs back to his wife, "Great idea. Now if you want to have sex with me, reach over and pull on my
penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, reach over and pull on my penis 50 times."
Why are
married women heavier than
single women?
Single women come home, see what's in the
fridge and go to
bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
A
man was invited for
dinner at a
friend's house. Every time the host needed something, he preceded his request to his
wife by calling her "My
Love", "Darling", "
Sweetheart", etc., etc.
His friend looked at him and said, "That's really nice after all of these years you've been married to keep saying those little pet
names."
The host said, "Well, honestly, I've forgotten her name."