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Little Johnny jokes

76 jokes about little johnny



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Proposal

Teacher: "Can you tell me something important that didn't exist 100 years ago?"

Little Johnny: "Me!"

6     → Joke


Proposal

Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ''Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?'' When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ''God Almighty!'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good'' and Mary fell back to sleep.

A while later the teacher asked Mary, ''Who is our Lord and Savior?'' But Mary didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ''Jesus Christ!'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good,'' and Mary fell back to sleep.

Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ''What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'' And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ''If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!''

8     → Joke


Proposal

Teacher: "I told you to write this poem out 10 times to improve your handwriting and you've only done it 7 times?"

Little Johnny: "Looks like my counting isn't too good either!"

7     → Joke


Proposal

Teacher: "If 1+ 1 = 2 and 2+ 2 = 4, what is 4+ 4?"

Little Johnny: "That's not fair you answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!"

4     → Joke


Proposal

Little Johnny wrote: "Dear Santa, please send me a baby brother!"

Santa wrote back: "Send me your mother ..."

6     → Joke


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