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53 jokes about lists



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Proposal

You are on the bus when you suddenly realize you need to fart.

The music on the bus is really loud, so you time your farts with the beat. After A couple of songs, you start to feel better as you approach your stop.

As you are leaving the bus, people are really staring you down, and looking really angry. That's when you remember you've been listening to your ipod.

2     → Joke


Proposal

Two guys are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, “I slept with your mother!”

The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other guy will do.

The first again yells, “I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!”

The other says, “Go home dad you’re drunk.”

1     → Joke


How many violists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. They're not small enough to fit.

10     → Joke


What's the difference between a general practitioner and a specialist?

One treats what you have, the other thinks you have what he treats.

9     → Joke


How is lightning like a violist's fingers?

Neither one strikes in the same place twice.

13     → Joke


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