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Proposal

A yuppie was opening the door of his BMW when a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the yuppie complained bitterly about the damage to his car.

"Officer, look what they've done to my Beemer!"

"You yuppies are so materialistic, it's ridiculous" retorted the officer. "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off."

"Oh, my God!" screamed the yuppie, noticing the bloody stump where his arm used to be. "My Rolex!"

2     → Joke


Computer games don't affect kids. If Pacman would have affected us as children, we would now run around in darkened rooms, munching pills and listening to repetetive music.

7     → Joke


A girl comes home and says to her boyfriend: "I have just had a tattoo of a sea shell on the inside of my leg at the top."

Her boyfriend gets his head between her legs and puts his ear to the tattoo and listens to the sea. "That's brilliant," he said "you can also smell the fish market!"

22     → Joke


Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, "Why do you want to join the Navy, son?"

"My father said it'd be a good idea, Sir."

"Oh? And what does your father do?"

"He's in the Army, Sir."

19     → Joke


Proposal

You are on the bus when you suddenly realize you need to fart.

The music on the bus is really loud, so you time your farts with the beat. After A couple of songs, you start to feel better as you approach your stop.

As you are leaving the bus, people are really staring you down, and looking really angry. That's when you remember you've been listening to your ipod.

2     → Joke


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