List jokes

53 jokes about lists


Computer games don't affect kids. If Pacman would have affected us as children, we would now run around in darkened rooms, munching pills and listening to repetetive music.

9     → Joke


A Frenchman, an Italian, a German, and a Spaniard are eating and discussing who's language was the most lovely.

"Well," says the Frenchman, "the French word for 'butterfly' is very lovely, 'papillon'"

"Ah," says the Italian, "but so is the Italian word for butterfly: 'Farfalla!'"
"As is the Spanish word." says the Spaniard. "Mariposa"
So the German is listening to all this and comes out saying: "So what's wrong with 'der schmetterling?'"

2     → Joke

What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start! (Unless you are an environmentalist; then you would consider this indiscriminate dumping of hazardous waste.)

14     → Joke

A girl comes home and says to her boyfriend: "I have just had a tattoo of a sea shell on the inside of my leg at the top."

Her boyfriend gets his head between her legs and puts his ear to the tattoo and listens to the sea. "That's brilliant," he said "you can also smell the fish market!"

24     → Joke

Having just moved into his new office, a pompous, new colonel was sitting at his desk when an airman knocked on the door. Conscious of his new position, the colonel quickly picked up the phone, told the airman to enter, then said into the phone,
"Yes, General, I'll be seeing him this afternoon and I'll pass along your message. In the meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir."

Feeling as though he had sufficiently impressed the young enlisted man, he asked, "What do you want?"

"Nothing important, sir," the airman replied, "I'm just here to hook up your telephone."

9     → Joke